Getting my 23&Me results about 3 years ago was life changing—in good and bad ways I think. Ever since receiving my results I’ve been on a quest to find out as much as I can about the cultures hidden in my DNA and buried underneath generations of assimilation to American culture. Since starting that quest I’ve realized learning “as much as I can” might not be much at all.
Of course, with the fact that traditions were mainly passed down orally, I get why some things aren’t easy to find. On the other hand, though, in this digital age where we have the internet, social media, pdf versions of historical sources, even books, why does it seem like there are none on Africa? As an African American, I want to know about where my ancestors came from and the intricacies of the cultures there but in the 3 years (or possibly more) of knowing what I have in my DNA I have the same amount of knowledge as before and even more questions and frustration.
I have an immense interest in cultural fashion and beauty so of course that's where I started my search to synthesize my current identity with the knowledge of the culture where my family ultimately came from. I was immediately met with a serious lack of information and a disconcerting amount of appropriation and all-around misconstrued information. Even when specifying by region— it’s all the same according to the internet apparently.
After being disappointed that the closest I felt to seeing anything is when I searched “Nigerian aesthetic” on Pinterest, I turned to the heavy artillery: JSTOR. All I found was the realization my only option might be to actually go to Nigeria.
Of course African history and culture is not taught in schools and as this NBC Philadelphia article put it: “‘...It’s an erasure of culture and heritage so that identities of African Americans for some are that of slaves and those fighting for their freedom.’” A lot of time over the decades, centuries even has been spent trying to dehumanize Black People. We have been stripped of our cultures and communities, our history, and ourselves. Some of us have been scrambling to find the petrified pieces of past lives ever since.
While some are happy just being seen as African American—which is TOTALLY FINE—I’ve personally never felt as if that term was anything more than a label. I never felt like I belonged. I grew up being told by other African Americans that I wasn’t one and didn’t fit in due to trivial to downright insulting reasons; so all my life I’ve been searching for more. Now that's my cross to bear, but a real one, nonetheless. I’ve been consulting my genetic makeup as if something in it will make me a real person with a community, with a culture. So until that day I’m left feeling like an amorphous being with no real beginning—no home.
Link to NBC Philadelphia article: ‘The Humanity of Blackness’ Missing From History Classes: How to Transform Black History Education in Schools – NBC10 Philadelphia (nbcphiladelphia.com)